I was listening to the news last night and heard that Missouri had not had snow in May since 1907, and the warmest  May 2nd we had ever had was in 1937 and it was 110. Talk about extreme weather. Today is still cold and we have had some light rain and it's just down right gloomy out. what do you do on a gloomy day? I know what I like to do. Curl up with a blanket and read a good mystery. I'm very fond of mysteries, and have been reading them since Nancy Drew, Trixie Beldon and when I was very young I read the Box Car Children and all of Enid Blyton's books. I always aspired to be an author, but I'm not sure I could sit still long enough to write a book. I did write a few poems and this is one of my favorites.

Murder She Cried
Guilty! Cried the judge.
As guilty as can be.
I sentence you to years
Of one hundred and three!
Then up jumped the woman
All dressed in bright red.
I did it! I killed him!
I'm glad he is dead.
Very quickly I did it
As he lay in our bed,
I used an iron skillet
And bashed in his head.
Various parts of him
Down the disposal they went.
The rest made into relish
To his relatives he was sent.
I'd never have been caught,
No body would have been found,
If it weren't for Aunt Bessie
Saying pickle relish ain't brown!
Now the moral of my story
Is sad, but it's true.
Don't pickle your husband
Unless you relish Aunt Bessie too.


If
If I were pretty,
If I were thin.
If I had great hair,
and a white toothy grin.
If I had been born
silver spoon in my mouth,
or groomed to preside
in the White House.
If I could win
the lotto today,
or if Ed McMahon
would come out my way.
If I could add,
multiply and subtract,
clearly it's left brain
function I lack.
If I could write
an award winning song,
or have a bottom that
looked good in a thong.
If I could play
a good lead guitar,
or sing like Alanis
I'd be a big star.
If it weren't for If,
all those things would be true.
So I am replacing the word IF,
with "Yes I can do".

OK that's it for me today, I'm going to go find that book and blanket and enjoy a cup of hot cocoa while I'm reading.  Might even find some time for some art.